It has recently been brought to my attention that I am an awesome writer. In the April 9, 2010 edition of Entertainment Weekly (a magazine I read cover-to-cover as soon as it arrives in the mail), the following quotation was printed in the “SoundBites” feature:
We all know that vampires are “in” right now. We’ve got Mormon vampires, cable TV vampires, and of course my favorite: Batman as a vampire. So it comes as no shock that TV comedy writers would be looting that vampire pot o’ gold for their non-vampire shows.
Plagiarism is the most sincere form of flattery, and I am truly flattered. Honestly, these little coincidences happen all the time. Instead of becoming angry and running to my local Pot o’ Gold Attorney to sue, I would like to make a proposition to the good people at Community. Hire me.
You know I’m good. You’re already using my funny jokes. Hire me to write for your show. I promise to bring donuts in on Fridays. In exchange you can pay me and put my name in tiny credits at the end of the show. It will be super awesome, I promise.