For years people have been asking Carly Simon who the song ‘You’re So Vain’ is about. Since she slept with Warren Beatty and Mick Jagger, she has – by extension – slept with 3/4 the population of the world. The song could almost literally be about all of us.
Carly has played coy since 1973; there is no reason to suspect she’s about to spill the beans anytime soon. So, my dear readers, I’m going to spill the beans for her. The song is a composite of men, as she’s long hinted it was. Who those men are will definitely surprise you.
1) Galactus. This destroyer of worlds was created by Jack ‘King’ Kirby in 1966 and has been causing trouble for superheroes ever since. He took some time off blowing up galaxies to sleep with Carly Simon in 1967-1968.
2) Skeletor. Though most of us know Skeletor as the rival to He-Man in the 1980’s, Skeletor was a freshman State Senator in New York in the early Sixties. He and Carly Simon smoked a little weed late one night and the rest is history.
3) Alan Rickman. The Dark Avenger. Dashing, British, and sometimes quite evil, Alan Rickman has been burning up the silver screen for many years. Before that, he burned up the bedsheets with Carly Simon in 1969.
4) Jabba the Hut. Seen here with his favorite fuzzy bunny. Jabba the Hut loves to party, and coincidentally so does Carly Simon. When his stretch limo pulled up to a young singer/songwriter hawking tunes for change, Carly jumped at the chance to play for a “private party” back at Hut Manor.
5) The Living Brain. Who wouldn’t fall for this guy?
I certainly hope you have been properly educated as to the men behind the hit song ‘You’re So Vain.’ These men are all vain, but that doesn’t mean we don’t love ’em.