Archive for March 24th, 2012


organ donor*

I am proud to be listed as an organ donor.  If, heaven forbid, a pack of wild rhinoceros tramples me to death but leaves a viable kidney or liver, I hope that part of me can be placed inside another human being so that they can live a better life.

I was horrified to learn that the current human manifestation of Satan, Dick Cheney, received a heart transplant today.  There was a decent, caring human being who died today, and that person’s heart is now beating for the man who is responsible for more civilian death than the terrorists who flew planes into the World Trade Center.  This is an atrocity.

This is a list of the people to whom my organs are not allowed to be donated under any circumstances.  I just hope the paramedics who retrieve my lifeless corpse read this blog before they stick my heart in a cooler packed with dry ice.

Dick Cheney
Fred Phelps
Pat Robertson
George HW Bush
George W Bush
Donald Rumsfeld
Henry Kissinger
Michael Bay

There are bad people in other countries who I won’t allow my organs to go to either, but the chances of certain Presidents of Iran wanting an American heart beating beneath their rib cages is probably slim.

If technology eventually allows Richard Nixon’s cryogenically frozen body to be reanimated and they need an organ or two to complete the puzzle, I will allow my organs to go to him.