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Friday Robots!!!

fridayrobots11-30-2007Okay, I’ve done one that’s a bit Abstract Robots. The black and white background image is a picture of Mt. Hood I took, back before it was covered in snow.

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Falling Rock

Falling Rock National Park

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Blog comic

“Tree City, U.S.A.”

In honor of the 5 o’clock darkness that descends on my fair city these days, I’d like to post this watercolor I did waaaaaaay back in the summertime. This pretty much sums up the downtown for me: buildings surrounded by lots and lots of trees.
pdx_summer

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Falling Rock

Falling Rock National Park

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Blog fiction

What Can I Buy To Make You Love Me More?

Money or Gift Cards?
A New Car?
CDs To Play In Your New Car?
What If I Finally Got That Pony You’ve Been Wanting Since You Were a Little Girl?
Something Hokey, Like Those Fake Glasses With A Moustache?
A Teddy Bear That Plays That James Blunt Song From A Year Ago When You Squeeze It?
Stocks and Bonds?
Property On The Moon?
A Crate Full Of Stolen Diamonds?
Fancy Soap?
Dinner At A French Restaurant That Has Tablecloths On The Tables?

Money can’t buy love where there was no love in the beginning, but maybe if there was love already, money can grow that love. Money can be the Miracle-Gro for the plant of love.
shake_n_feed

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Falling Rock

Falling Rock National Park

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Blog fiction

Host

My body is host to millions of bacteria. Some people host a malformed conjoined twin. You can host a tapeworm in your intestines. One boy recently played host to two spiders in his left ear canal. Ever had ants in your pants? When it comes down to it, the human body is a wonderful place for things to live and grow. It is a veritable ecosystem unto itself; vast swaths of unclaimed real estate just waiting for tiny farmers, merchants, religious zealots, and soccer moms to come and make it their home.

And really, should it be any other way? After all, don’t we humans colonize every available patch of land, water, and air? With any luck we’ll be living on the Moon within the next 25 years. Why can’t our bodies be the same to other organisms?

My problem, and I suspect the problem facing many of us, is how to best monetize all that real estate without affecting your way of life. Suppose Avian Flu wants to pay you a monthly fee to live in your lungs. No problem, you say, but after a couple of days you’re not feeling so good. Avian Flu is actually stopping you from being able to perform necessary daily tasks, like keeping meals down and leaving your bed. Turns out Avian Flu, while a good renter, is not so good at co-inhabiting your body. You then have to kill Avian Flu. While that may be a doctor’s opinion, it is not good for your bank account.

I suggest you find organisms that don’t keep you bedridden or kill you outright. Tapeworms, mentioned above, are good in moderation. Just make sure they don’t plan on starting a family in your gut. Flesh-eating bacteria is a bad idea, as is Ebola, the plague (or “Black Death”), and large land mammals (elephants, bison, giraffes, etc). Look at the renters’ history with other people before signing them to a lease.

Remember: your health is your most valuable asset. Don’t let an easy payday get in the way of a long, happy life.
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Falling Rock

Falling Rock National Park

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autobiography Blog

Three of Us

In September, This American Life held a little contest.
From their website: For “Episode 339: Break-UP,” TAL contributor Starlee Kine, along with musicians Joe McGinty and Julia Greenberg, wrote their own break-up song, “The Three of Us.” The song changed dramatically depending on how it was mixed, so we thought it’d be cool to have a remix contest to see what you would do with the song.

Mine was one of the 129 entries they received. It failed to be one of the “winners,” possibly because I have no musical ability. All I did was mix the tracks they gave us; I didn’t add any awesome drumming or face-melting guitar solos. Actually, I did add a few touches. I lifted bits from two movies that I thought added to the song, and some backwards guitar played by my friend Andy.

I can’t figure out how to post the song here, but I will let you know if This American Life posts it on their website.

I had a lot of fun mixing the tracks together. I’ve often thought that, given the chance, I’d like to be a recording engineer. Mixing music, mixing movie sound effects; these sound like really fun jobs.

There are other fun jobs out there, too. Palentologist is the first one that springs to mind.

Categories
Falling Rock

Falling Rock National Park