Archive for October 17th, 2007

Matt Groening in the Sidewalk With Diamonds

That’s right! Matt Groening, the cartoonist extraordinaire, attended the high school that is near my home. We only missed each other by about 34 years. I literally discovered he went to school there because I was looking down at the sidewalk and saw Bart Simpson looking back up at me.

I use the high school’s track during the summer, and feel that somehow I was drawn (heh) to that place for a reason. Seriously, of all the high schools that I could have lived near, I somehow ended up by the one that happened to have the most famous cartoonist in the world as its alum.

My guess is they invited him back to do this sidewalk drawing after he got famous. I surmise this because my old high school hasn’t asked me to draw anything in the sidewalk yet. If they ever do ask, I will be glad to draw Bart Simpson for them.

At the very least, I’ll have something to say if I ever meet Matt Groening. You know, besides “I love you, man.”


Would you be willing to teleport yourself? If your immediate answer is yes, you’re at the right blog. The downside, according to this article, is that you wouldn’t be able to teleport unscathed. You’d essentially reappear as a second-generation copy of yourself, not unlike a fax.

Now, I don’t know about you, but I can’t stand the fax. I’ve hated fax machines since Day One. Their horrible reproduction quality, the slowness of the transfer, hearing that awful telephonic noise. What is redemptive about a fax? That’s why I’m glad email attachments have gotten big enough to send images and documents. No longer do we, as a society, need to rely on that hideous abomination, the fax machine.

But back to teleportation. The article in question states that current teleportation is only used for individual particles, and it only replicates the particle’s attributes, not an exact duplicate of the particle. Oh yeah, and it only moves the particle about a foot or two. So you could be teleported, but you would be a greatly inferior copy of yourself, and you’d only have moved a tiny distance. My hopes, high as Everest at the beginning of the article, were somewhere in Death Valley by the end. Science has failed to bring us something useful and awesome yet again. On the other hand, though, it is pretty cool that teleportation exists at all. I mean, a small chance of something is always better than no chance.

I remain optimistic.

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